After years of feeling invisible in the dating world, I finally found someone who sees me for who I am. Here's what I learned along the way...

The Struggle Was Real

For most of my twenties, I felt like I was invisible to potential partners. Dating apps were particularly challenging - people would swipe past my profile without reading it, or worse, match with me out of curiosity rather than genuine interest.

I have cerebral palsy, and while it doesn't define me, it's part of who I am. I walk with crutches, and I need accommodations in many situations. But I'm also funny, creative, passionate about social justice, and I make a mean chocolate chip cookie.

The Turning Point

Everything changed when I decided to be completely upfront about my disability in my dating profiles. Instead of hiding it or mentioning it briefly, I made it a central part of my story. I included photos that showed me using my crutches, and I wrote about how my disability has shaped my perspective on life.

This wasn't about making my disability my entire personality - it was about being authentic. I realized that anyone who couldn't handle seeing the real me wasn't someone I wanted to date anyway.

What I Learned

Here are the key lessons I learned on my dating journey:

• Authenticity attracts the right people: When you're genuine about who you are, you attract people who appreciate the real you.
• Accessibility matters: Don't be afraid to ask for accommodations on dates. A good partner will want you to be comfortable.
• Patience is key: Finding the right person takes time, regardless of ability status.
• Community support helps: Connecting with other disabled people who are dating provided invaluable support and advice.

Meeting My Person

I met Alex through a mutual friend at an accessibility-focused event. He approached me because he was genuinely interested in the conversation I was having about inclusive design, not because he felt sorry for me or was curious about my disability.

Our first date was at a coffee shop that I knew was accessible. When I mentioned needing to sit in a specific area, he didn't bat an eye - he just helped me find the perfect spot. That's when I knew he was different.

Now, two years later, we're planning our wedding. Alex sees my disability as part of what makes me unique, not as something to overcome or ignore. He's become my biggest advocate and my best friend.

For Anyone Reading This

If you're disabled and struggling with dating, know that you deserve love just as much as anyone else. Your disability doesn't make you unlovable - it makes you uniquely you. The right person will see that beauty.

Don't settle for someone who tolerates your disability. Hold out for someone who celebrates it as part of what makes you amazing.